My Journey into Optimism...

is going well-ish?

I suppose the above statement basically explains it, huh? Well-ish. That's about my level today. It's nice out, I got a new shirt today, and I am going to see a friend's band tonight at my bar, where I have money for ONE drink, which is good because I really shouldn't drink much. But I'm still feeling a little... meh, emotionally.

I've been applying for a few jobs, and I plan on calling them all on Monday to see if they've seen my resume and if they would like to schedule an interview. There's one that's already emailed me back, but it's probably the worst of the ones I've applied to because it's only temporary, but still better than nothing. I will call that one last on Monday to make sure that if anything else seems more lead-y I don't get too caught up with the mediocre one.

The gym is... hard. I need to do laundry before I go again because I'm out of gym clothes except socks and I'm pretty sure you're supposed to wear more than that when you're on the elliptical and bike. The elliptical is hard as shit, but I'm doing it. I only did 10 minutes the last couple times I went but holy crap. It's tough on my poor legs... which are already pretty brutalized by simply existing. My sister got the official decree from her doctor that she has arthritis in her knees, so I don't expect good news if I ever get insurance. And i'm not being pessimistic here, I'm being honest. They swell and hurt with changing weather but why the hell do you  care because whoa: We all have aches and pains, right? Right. Other good gym news: my ass hurts on this hard wooden chair I'm using because I can feel my tail bone on the wood. That's awesome. I totally forgot that could even happen because it hasn't for the past three or four years, so woohoo!

My bridesmaid's dress will be delivered to my house on Monday, which means I get to see how much it already needs to be taken in! Hooray. I really wish I'd ordered the 10 instead of the 12, but I didn't in case I got all slacker-y. I'm actually really pleased with the dress because it's knee length and a super pretty style. I'm just hoping that the color isn't totally awful. It's "pacific blue"... aka "HOLY SHIT that's blue". I still need to acquire silver shoes for the wedding but my friend Cora might have a pair of closed toe pumps so hopefully I don't have to really spend any more money on it. Other than baby yellow nail polish because that's just adorable. And probably some jewelry or something else I'll never use again. I'm kind of wondering if I were to soak it in a black dye after the wedding, if the dress would come out looking really cool.

I just discovered this website for writers called Book Country. You can read and review others works, as well as post your own. I'm definitely not ready to do any posting yet, considering the fact that I just sent Darach my first four chapters and I feel ill every time I think about him reading it, but it does seem really cool. Eventually you'll be able to self-publish through the website, which is run by Penguin, but the books you publish wont have the Penguin logo, they'll have book country, which makes sense because they don't want to just slap Penguin on anything.

I'm going to give myself a few simple goals for the week, and then when I post next week, I'll feel obligated to discuss how well I did with those goals, which will give me accountability. (this week being Saturday through Friday.)

·         I will call the jobs I applied for on Monday. This is definitely the most important.

·         I will eat well all week, and will go to the gym at least four times. Preferably five or six.

·         I will work on Sophie's blanket at least a little. (SO SICK OF KNITTING IT)

·         I will write at least five pages.

That last goal is going to be pretty difficult as I'm not totally sure where it's going, but whatever. I like the idea of setting weekly goals for myself. It seems so much easier than new years resolutions. I'm not great with big picture stuff, really. It's probably why I'm terrible with money. But this weekly stuff? I think I can rock it.

Regardless:

I am reading:

Fragile Things by Neil Gaiman who is a genius and I love him.

Needful Things by Steven King who is a genius but holy shit are there too damn many characters in this book. I get why but dude. My memory is not great. Fortunately, a couple of them are already dead, so at least that's partly cleared up.

I will be reading some H.P. Lovecraft once Needful Things is done. I'd been wanting to check it out but after reading A Study In Emerald by Gaiman (it's in Fragile Things) I feel like I need to. As usual, Gaiman is amazing.

Lately I am listening to:

Ellem- Fun, girly music which feels sort of guilty pleasure-ish.

Noah and the Whale- Sort of a folk rock, very cool.

Athlete- Good, british music. One of their songs was on the Van Gogh episode of Doctor Who and it's so good.

Dragonforce- Super fast, awesome power metal that makes me kick my ass at the gym. 3 miles in just over five minutes on the bike? Hells to the yes!

Greg Laswell- chill awesome music, with a pretty sexy voice. His song Comes and Goes (in Waves) is amazing and makes me feel good when I'm down.